Conversations with My Boyfriend: Ice Cream

Me: What do you want for dinner?

Boyfriend: I don't know. What were you gonna make?

Me: Well I have like a half a box of spaghetti, but only enough for me so I'd have to make you like a half a box of ziti... then there's some leftover sauce, and some leftover mozzarella...basically leftover pasta bits.

Boyfriend: I guess I'll just go out and get something for myself.

Me: You'll go out and get something!? What about me!

Boyfriend: Well you said there was only enough spaghetti for you, so I'll just get something else for me.

Me: That's real selfish. Real selfish.

Boyfriend: Well what did you want to do?

Me: GET ICE CREAM. How is that not the next logical conclusion?

Boyfriend: *burst of laughter* *shakes head*

Me: I don't understand how you don't go from "oh making dinner will be a hassle" directly to "ice cream is the solution".

Boyfriend: Ice cream isn't my favorite.

Me: Ice cream is a meal, if you do it correctly.

Boyfriend: No it's not. Plus, I have it every day at work, so I never really want it after that.

Me: WHAT. You eat ice cream every day at work?!

Boyfriend: Just like a scoop.

Me: Oh my God, what kind?

Boyfriend: Vanilla. Just one spoonful.

Me: That's the saddest thing ever. Your life is so sad. That one tiny spoon of vanilla ice cream is enough for you.


Boyfriend: I don't really even like ice cream.

Me: It's like you're not a real person. What is wrong with you.

Boyfriend: *shrugs* So what do you want for dinner?

In case you're wondering, I ended up getting ice cream with a girlfriend who is normal.